Hello readers. My name is Ricardo de Leon, creator of Realeyes The World.
I came about my spiritual awakening at some point during 2019. I am not quite sure of exactly when because I wasn’t seeking it and I had only realized it listening to an Alan Watts lecture during the Summer. I stumbled upon this journey on January 26, 2019 (according to my google search history) when I first tried meditating. I was desperate and at the end of my ropes… I was mentally depressed and had been having suicidal thoughts for several months by then. It seemed like the only solution that I could find or think of to ease my mind from all of the pressure that I felt I was under. The mental pattern of thinking that I had developed throughout my life had finally hit a dead end; not a road-block. It was the end of the trip; last stop; do not past go or collect $200; etc. I could no longer bear the relentless day-in, day-out routine that was leading me to nowhere. The things that didn’t go my way, big or small, began to threaten my very existence as if there was no acceptable alternative outcome… I threw in the towel to my wife, that I was no longer the macho-husband who could hold the weight of the world for everyone on his shoulders. I dropped my pride and opened up to her hoping she had a solution for me… At last, I went to the Doctors, against my own belief system of letting things heal “naturally,” seeking medication for anxiety… and admittedly, the ‘high’ that usually comes with those types of drugs. That didn’t work out which seemed like the last trick in the bag I might’ve had.
The day I first tried meditating was the day that I felt like I could continue life with those feelings I had at the time. There wasn’t an “Ah-ha!” moment, I didn’t have a sudden burst of enthusiasm for just being alive. Life from that day on just had that “new” feeling to it… in every moment. Continuing the practice from that point on felt natural. I started losing weight eating what naturally felt right, exercising effortlessly, I became a lot more pleasant to be around, and I was around – not cooped up in the house. I went in to mediation with absolutely zero expectations and minimal research except how to do it. Thus, I found myself doing research on the back-end about things I would experience. I eventually started to read in to the spiritual application of meditation and things started to add up from there. Eventually, I realized that I had experienced a spiritual awakening; I found enlightenment; I became self-aware. My whole understanding of life, the physical word, the body, language, everything… changed.
There’s no more resistance to “what is,” no more anxiety of things of the future, no more depression from things of the past. There’s a surrender to this great symphony that we call “life.” Flowing like water. And so… here we are today. Thank you for taking the time to read about me.
